Losing you
by small light
Summary: Sakuno changed last summer and when she comes back to school she decides that she had enough of Ryoma's quiet atitude and gives up on her love. But Ryoma doesn't want to lose her to anyone.(Ryoma-Sakuno and or Fuji-Sakuno) -final chapter-
1. Default Chapter

I CHANGES

Summer came and went and with it brought new things both good and bad. For Sakuno Riyuzaki a 17 year old girl it was one that showed her a path towards her future, and brought her a step closer to being an adult.

When the teachers told her that all first year students will go to a camp to search for their future she was disappointed. She had so many plans for that summer and they would all go to waste.

But as she stood now in front of the high school gates, she knew it was all worth it. She was no longer the shy uncertain girl that all took for granted. Now she had a porpoise she was sure of herself and most of all, she now knew that she to was good at something.

Now a second year student at the prestigious school Seishon Gakuen she walked towards her future leaving her past behind.

I wonder if I'll be in the same clas with Tomoka and the others this year too. I hope so. Ah.. there's Tomo.

"Tomo-chan! Hy how are you? How was your summer?"

"Sakuno?... is that really you?"

"What do you mean Tomoka?"

"Well you've changed. …. A lot."

"I just had a hair-cut and I guess it's also because I'm not wearing an uniform but casual clothes. But uther than that I'm still the same."

"I guess you're right."'No Sakuno, it's not the clothes or the haircut. You changed… it's like you've grown up.'

"So what club did you join ?"

"Huh! Club? I'm not joining any club. I'm dedicating all my time to Ryoma-sama. Someone has to chear for him, and feed him, and… hey Sakuno are you listening?"

"Huh? Oh yeah. Greate. You do that." 'Why do we always talk about him. it's like his the center of our univers, and he doesn't even apriciate it. Really why do I even bother liking that guy? He never shows even the slightest emotion'

_**Hey,hey**_  
_**Bye, bye (bye bye)**  
_

"Oh here he comes! Ryoma-sama!"

"hy Ryoma."

"…"

'Honestly the least he could do is answer back. Do I really like him. I mean there is no such thing as love at first sight right? And he never encouraged me… so…'

**_Bye, bye (bye bye)_**

'I don't know why my heart acts this way when I see him but the truth of the mater is that he doesn't see me as anything other than a friend. If even that.'

"Ryoma-sama when's your practice? I want to come and chear for you."

"After school" 'Why is Tomo being so noysy. And why is Sakuno so distracted? She hasn't said a word since I came in, and she keeps staring at me like she's looking for something. Girls…. I'll never understand them. But I would really like to have the chance to understand her. Well maybe one day…'

"are you going to be there?"

"Huh?... yeah, sure." Sakuno was shocked he actually asked her to come, did that mean that he liked her as much as she did him?

'wow… hold on. Don't you think that you're jumping to conclusions? Gees! He probably wants to be sure he can plan his exit.'

Maybe but I what if he…

'What if… what if? Why don't you just ask him and find out. And if he doesn't like you than go on with your life.'

That's right I have to find out what he thinks about me. I've been in this game for too long and I'm tired of it. I need answers, and today I'll ask him after his practice.

_  
**Boy I'm doing this tonight**_

**_Probably gonna start a fight_**

_**I know this can't be right**  
_

That entire day Sakuno couldn't think about anything else other than wheather it was a good idea to ask Ryoma for a direct answer or not. After school ended and she finished applying for her choice clubs, she was half led half dragged by a very upset Tomoko to the tennis courts where Ryoma and the other regulars were practicing.

She sat down on the same bench as last year and began watching him like always, only this time she couldn't help but wonder why was he so cold to her, and exactly why was she there supporting him when he never did that for her.

**_Hey baby come on_**

**_I loved you endlessly_**

**_And you weren't there for me_**

**_So now it's time to leave and make it alone._**

Not even once did he sow a kind gesture towards her, and he made her cry so much… she had to get this over with…she had to know so that she could start mendind her broken heart.

**_I know that I can't take no more,_**

**_It ain't no lie_**

**_I wanna see you out that door_**

**_Baby bye bye bye._**

Meanwhile, unknown to her she had some spectators of her own.

"Hey Echizen! Your fan-club's here."

"…"

"Hm… is it me or did our Sakuno change? Not that I'm complaining. What do you think Eiji sempai?"

"HM..? now that you mention it she does seem different. More grown-up. Plus that new haircut really makes her look nice. Right Fuji"

"Yea… shes Verry pretty and…"

"…she's also smart. She's currently a member of the lit club and did you know that she used to write for a magazine?"

"Brains and beauty, a killer combination I would say. Who knew that our little Sakuno was hiding so much from us?"

"Hey Fuji be careful it sounds like you're planning an attack"

"And if I was, what would you do than Momo?"

"Oh… it's not me that you should worry about. Ryoma should be your main concern. Look at the scary face he has on."

'What are these guys doing? Do they really want to piss me of? Don't they know that Sakuno is mine, and only mine? If they even dare think I'll let them near her they….'

"Although I can understand you Fuji… I mean she really is quite pretty and if it were me I would ….."

"Why aren't you training? 20 laps. NOW"

"Oh come on Tezuka. We were just talking about our Sakuno, and how she changed. Doesn't she seem prettier?"

"She's pretty. Now start your training or I'll make you run laps until your legs fall of."

"YES buchou!"

'Our Sakuno, our Sakuno, what's with this guys. She's MINE. And no one's going to take her away from me.'

From the bench Sakuno watched them train while her friend kept talking or rather screaming about how great Ryoma was.

'What am I doing? Who am I trying to fool? He doesn't care about me; if he did he wouldn't act so cold. He always plays me around, giving me hope and than crushing all of my dreams. And I'm such a fool to be caught so easily in his game. I guess that's all it is to him, a game. And I like the fool that I am keep on falling in his trap. Well not anymore.'

******_bye) I don't want to be a fool for you_**

**_Just another player in your game for two_**

**_You may hate me but it ain't no lie_**

**_Baby bye bye bye._**

'I'm not going to do this anymore. I have better things to do than cry over high-school crushes. I'll get over it, learn from it and become stronger.'

"Hey Sakuno it looks like they finished practice. Lets meet him at the main gate."

"Ok" 'So close'

I don't really want to make it though,

As they approached the main gate they saw 2 figures waiting for them. One friendly and soothing the way Momo-chan always seemed to be, and another one that was mysterious and dark and cold only be Ryoma. With every step Sakuno felt her heart pounding against her chest. But she was determined to finish this game today.

"Hi Ryoma. Listen can we talk a bit? I want to ask you something"

I just want to tell you that I had enough

"…"

"Hey you guys can talk later.first lets go have lunch. What do you say gils? Our treat!"

'Really Momo-sempai!"

"Is it ok with you Ryoma? Wouldn't I be a bother?"

"I guess it can't be helped."

Baby bye bye bye.

She felt like crying, but she couldn't, not there, not in front of him. She won't give him that satisfaction. He will never see her crying again, and she decided that after today she would never cry again.

"tomoko why don't you go ahead, I remembered I had to write something for the lit club. I'm sorry Momo-sempai, perhaps another time."

"Are you sure?"

"Yeah? I'd better hurry now" 'Hurry and leave before I start crying.'

"Well ok then. See you tomorrow."

She never answered her friend back, she couldn't her voice was far to shaky, and tears were beginning to pour out of her eyes, so before they could see her she ran, as fast and as far as she could, and she didn't stop until her legs were to tired to move and her body was shaking violently from her sobs.

She found shelter in a beautiful park but it's beauty was lost to her as she left herself be consumed by sadness and grief. She felt her heart braking in a million pieces and than in a million more, and she could do was cry for one last time, for what she wanted but never could have.

**_I'm giving up I know for sure_**

**_I don't wanna be the reason of your love no more_**

**_(Bye bye)_**

**_I'm checking out I'm signing of_**

**_I don't wanna be the loser and I've had enough._**

When her tears subsided and the chilling autumn wind made her shiver awake she decided that that was enough, that she had cried enough and that now she should get on with her life.

'It's gonna be hard but it's better than living a lie. He never did give me much hope so maybe next time I fall in love I'll fall for someone that deserves it. But first I have to learn how to fall out of love.'

**_I lived for you and me_**

**_And now I really come to see_**

**_That life will be much better_**

**_Once you're gone._**

When she got home it was late but her grandmother was still out. She felt even lonelier in that empty house that night tan any other time. To tiered to do anything, she decided to sleep and for once it came straight away whisking her away from the pain of reality and into the wonderful world of dreams and magic. Her last words before she fell asleep were to the one responsible for her pain and a plea and promise for her future.

"Good-bye Ryoma. One day I'll forget how to love you."

**_Baby bye bye bye._**


	2. temptation

i don't own prince of tennis

i've been asked about the reason why all of the regulars are still in the same high scool althou Ryoma is a second year student now. well it's simple. where i come from the school sistem works like this:

- school it has eight years and two levels and it starts from age 7 and it ends at 15

-hghschool 4 years from 15 to 19

and then college from 19 to 23/24

now this '...' shows a persons thoughts

and this ... is the anoying voice inside their heads (aka me :p)

2 Temptation

Morning came and with it life began anew.

Come on Sakuno get yourself together. You can't stay inside your room forever. What happened to your promise to start your life again from zero? Get up and out of this house. Or do you want him to win?

'I'll never let him brake me. And I'll never brake the promise I made yesterday. I can do this I can start over.'

That's the spirit. Now what do we have on our schedule?

'Let's see… I know I've wrote it down somewhere, but where?... I got it! It's in my notebook. Let's see now:

7am waking up followed by a morning jog and some push ups, than a quick shower breakfast and school. Doesn't sound that hard. Well it's almost seven now so I'd better get ready to jog.'

She made her way around her room, first brushing her teeth and hair and than getting dressed in her sports outfit. Seeing how it was still warm outside she chose a pair of low cut denim short's and a tea shirt that ended just above her navel. She tied her hair in a high ponytail to keep it out of her eyes and chose a cd for her player. It was last summer that she discovered how refreshed she felt after a short jog and she just kept that habit. She also made it a habit to listen to music while running. Today she chose Avril Lavigne.

After she made sure that her backpack had all the necessary items she left the house heading towards the park nearby. With the music blowing in her ears she was able to forget about Ryoma and concentrate on her training. She was so out of it that she didn't even notice when she went past Kaidoh.

He was surprised to see her there so early and even more surprised to see her jogging at such a fast pace. Noticing the headphones he supposed that she was trying to concentrate on the music so that she could run faster and not feel as tired as one would otherwise. He didn't stay with her for long because they had different routes. 'I guess that she only runs for an hour or maybe even less. But that's still quite a lot for someone that doesn't do sports. She improved her balance a lot, doesn't trip over her own two feet anymore… and she definitely improved her form … a lot.' Just as soon as he finished that thought a small blush spread across his cheeks.

Meanwhile Sakuno had already reached the park and finish her laps and now proceeded to do her sit-ups. After 100 sit-ups she decided that that was enough and began her jog back home, once there, she took a shower and than she headed towards the kitchen to eat some breakfast. On the fridge door there was a note from her grandmother.

"I had to go to school sooner and didn't want to wake you. See you tonight"

"Yeah right. I wasn't even in my room. Will you ever take the time to notice me grandma, or will I always be second to everyone of your kids coach Ryuzaki? Oh well, some things never change so why fight them?"

After having breakfast and changing her clothes, she left for school.

There, not seeing her friend she decided to head towards class. On her way there she almost ran into Ryoma who for some reason was going in the opposite direction.

'I'm not going to say a word. I'll ignore him like he ignores me.' So walking past him seemingly not seeing him she entered her class-room where her friends greeted her.

'That wasn't so hard.'

Ryoma on the other hand had a whole different opinion about what happened. He was confused, and didn't know what to attribute the sudden change in Sakuno's behavior to. He wondered if she was mad at him and was almost sure that that was the case but had no idea what to do abut it. He decided to go back seeing how the object of his quest arrived already.

"Sakuno you were late. You were never late before. What happened?"

"Nothing Tomo. I just had to do something this morning and it took me a little more than I thought it would."

'I guess I'll have to wake up earlier from now on. I can't be late every day.'

'What was she doing this morning?'

"Ah! Ryoma-sama, you're here to. How are you? Are you excited about the tournament, who ar you going to play? What are you going to play singles or doubles?"

"Don't know. Hi Sakuno."

"Hello Ryoma."

'Huh? What's going on? Sakuno never called Ryoma–sama Ryoma before. And she was always shy when she talked to him. Now it's like she doesn't care anymore. Very strange.'

"Hey Tomo can you do me a favor and do this weeks class cleaning? I promise to fill in for you when it's your turn."

"Aaah! Sure Sakuno. Me and Ryoma will do all of the chores perfectly. Huh? Wait a minute. Why are you switching with me? Did anything happen between Ryoma-sama and you?"

"What! No way. Don't be ridiculous Tomo. I have club activities, and I don't want to be late on the first week."

"Oh… guess that makes sense. But that means that you won't come to cheer for Ryoma-sama."

"Yeah I guess. Sorry Tomo-chan." 'Actually I'm really glad that I can use this so that I can get out of the Ryoma club. I couldn't bear seeing him every day and cheer him when all I want to do is scream at him, it would be to painful.'

'Huh..? She's not coming anymore? What did I do?'

At practice Ryoma missed Sakuno's presence. She always had a soothing effect for him and now that she wasn't there anymore he was more grumpy than usual.

'And where is Oishi sempai going?'

"He's going to meet Sakuno at the library. Something about a club project. But if you ask me he just wants to see her. Everyone's impressed by her and seems to want her. You should be worried Echizen"

"Nobody asked you."

"So uncute."

'Why is everything going wrong? She's ignoring me, all the guys talk about her and on top of that it looks like Oishi sempai likes her. I know she changed over the summer but she's the same Sakuno that I l… I have to find her.'

**In the library**

He looked for a while after her but resigned himself when he couldn't find her.

'I guess she left. I should have been here earlier. Now she might fail her club assignment and it's my entire fault.'

"Oishi sempai, sorry to keep you waiting but I went to by some cola. Would you like some?"

The girl in front of him smiled and handed him the cold drink. He was taken aback by her looks he remembered her having these long braids, and wearing her school uniform that always made her look smaller than she was. But this girl and that one were to different persons. This new one had her hair lose and to the side, it wasn't as long as it was before but it was more stylish. It was also a bit curled he suspected it was because of her braids. She wasn't wearing an uniform anymore but a pair of faded jeans and a blue blouse that fully exposed her shoulders. He stuttered out an apology and then they proceed towards the library.

There they talked about her assignment and he was surprised she was so smart. She had already read all of dickens and most of Shakespeare not to mention the tree Russians that he personally thought as a must in ones culture. She also had seen a lot of the plays he liked.

'I really do like her, but not the way most would think. I want to protect her because although she acts happy and smiles I can tell that something saddens her and her heart is troubled.'

Soon it was eight and the library rep told them that they had to leave. Unknown to them, this whole time someone was watching them closely, waiting for the right moment to emerge from the shadows. But as the hours went by Ryoma didn't find an opportunity and felt his heat twisting in pain every time he would see her smile or hear her laugh at one of Oishi's joke. It was almost to much for him to take when his sempai put an arm around her shoulders and almost came out of his hiding place, ready to tare him apart, but when she shrugged it of, he felt like a little of his former strength came back.

When the two left he also took of but took a shortcut so that he could reach the main gate before them. When he saw her approach he was taken aback by the fact that she was alone but as she went past him and almost left him there alone, he reached for her hand and stopped her.

"Are you really that mad at me? Why? What did I do? Don't you understand?"

Chancing a glance towards her face he was surprised to see the emotions in her eyes, and the one that was more obvious than al others was sadness.

He let her hand go and walked away not knowing what to do, or say.

'What's going on? What did he mean?' she couldn't understand it, but all the emotions were replaced by anger when she remembered her promise.

'What is he doing? Why doesn't he stop playing this stupid game? If he thinks that I'll go back to being the same girl that always hung around him just because of a few words that I didn't even understand than he's got another thing coming. Sorry Ryoma but I'm not falling for it, not this time.'

Home there was no one expecting her but a note from her grandmother telling her that she had to go out of town urgently and she won't be back for a few weeks.

'So what's new? It's not like you ever cared enough to put me above tennis, I'm used to it. But I'm never going to let you or anyone else make me feel second best.'

Flashback

"Here you are. Do you know for how long I've been looking for you? You made me worry like hell!"

"S-sorry…"

"Huh… Why are you crying? What's wrong?"

"Nothing."

"Come on, you can tell me. I won't tell anyone else. It will be our secret."

"It's just that everyone seems to be good at something, except me. And I'm tired of being second best."

"Tell me, what's your dream?"

"My dream?"

"Yes. Your dream."

"I don't know. But what does that have to do…"

"Only when you follow your dream can you be the best. Don't worry; I'm sure you'll find it."

End flashback

'Thank you Akira. Thank you for helping me find my dream. I'll never let it go.'

The following days were pretty much the same and Sakuno began to believe that her heart will be mended a lot faster than she thought before. That was until the day Ryoma decided he had had enough.

It started like all the others days. She first jogged than showered and left for school scolding herself for not eating breakfast. But when she entered the school the halls seemed emptier than usual and an unsettling feeling made its way to her heart.

She walked ahead towards her class and was almost clear of whatever danger her heart warned her of when a hand garbed her from behind and pulled her inside the chemistry lab situated next to her own class. Her heart was pounding so hard she thought she would die and when her eyes opened she saw exactly who her attacker was and why was her heart screaming that way. It was ryoma. She wanted to leave but he had her trapped against the wall his arms creating unbreakable barriers. Then she looked into his eyes and knew that she had already lost this fight.

"Why?"

He never thought he would do this but she made him an unreasonable fool, and with each day he became more and more determined to find out why she was tormenting him, making him lose control, something he always prided himself with. Why was she abandoning him? Leaving him behind like an unwanted toy. So when he saw her today, he decided to do something although he didn't know what. And so here he was, in the chemistry lab with Sakuno trapped in his arms and no one to come for at least an hour. When he looked into her eyes he couldn't think of anything, other than how it would be to kiss her. So he bent his head and covered her lips with his own. He felt their warmth and the sweet taste made him hunger for more. With out hurry he began to gently nip at her lower lip and than licked the offended portion. When Sakuno gasped in surprise he depend the kiss exploring her mouth and tempting her to respond. As he felt her relax in his arms and respond to his kiss he deepened it even more until all he could feel was her sweet taste and all he could smell was her unique scent that filled his nose and made him lose control every time. He then realized that they could be discovered and he didn't want that. Not yet, and not now that he knew. So he unwillingly ended it but kept her close to his chest and looked into her eyes once more.

"I see."

A small smile crossed his lips as he planted a last kiss on her forehead and left. As soon as he let her out of his arms he was shocked at how cold and wrong it felt. It was as if something of vital importance was missing. But as he glanced back and saw her staring at him in disbelief he was a little more at ease for now he knew that nothing could take her away from him. He won't allow it.

When she heard the door close she realized that she was alone and that he had left. Sakuno couldn't believe what just happened, nor did she know how to act. What was he thinking? Why did he kiss her? And more important why did he live? Was this another game?

All that day she couldn't think of anything else and because she had separate classes from Ryoma that day she couldn't find the chance to see if he meant anything by it.

When she headed for the exit to go home her head and heart were a mess, and there he was standing in front of her as cool and collected as always. Was he waiting for her? She thought full of hope.

"There you are Echizen! Let's go. I'm starving."

"You were the one late Momo sempay. You should thank me for waiting for you."

'So he wasn't here for me. I'm such a fool.'

She walked ahead passing the two boys and praying that he would stop her, but alas not even a glace. She felt her heart breaking again. She would have thought it impossible but for the pain that was tearing her apart. Going to an empty house having no one to comfort her, she felt like crying but didn't.

"Never again will I cry. Not for you or anyone Echizen!"

Sleep evaded her that night and no mate what it was like she was doomed to be the slave of her thoughts.

The following morning was bright and sunny everything she wasn't.

Hey come on get up. You'll ruin your schedule again.

'I don't care.'

He really got to you didn't he. Man, I thought that you were stronger than this, but I guess I was wrong.

'What do you mean?'

Just a small gesture from him and you crumble to the floor. So tell me did you cry again?

'NEVER'

**I'm bouncing of the walls again**

**I'm looking like a fool again"**

You're such a fool to believe in him you know?

'Yeah'

'I'd better get ready to jog, I don't want to be late for school again. My back hurt's, I guess it wasn't such a good idea to sleep on the floor.'

**Waking up on the bathroom floor**

Hey are you ok?

'yeah'

You seem calm, too calm.

'It's ok to fall down as long as you get up .'

**Pull myself together just to fall once more**

So you admit that you'll fall again. So weak.

'I'll fall and get hurt. Bu I'll get up until I won't fall again. Now I have to jog.'

Her morning was just like all the others before, except for the sadness that kept creeping back in her heart. By the time she left for school all those annoying thoughts that she tried to block all morning came back with a vengeance.

When she reached her class she hopped that he wouldn't be there, but he was and it took all of her strength to stop herself from crying. She could feel her heart beating faster and faster and barely managed to answer her friend's greetings.

**And my hart's steel beating out of my chest**

She had to stop this thoughts about him, she tried thinking about her future and how she would make her own dream come true, but she also remembered that in this town it was almost impossible for her to do so because of all its taboos. She had been labeled as an outsider and succeeding in art was almost impossible if you didn't have some support behind you. She wouldn't find support here.

**And this town's still making me sick**

"Hey Sakuno I brought you this back."

"Huh… Oh thank's Tomoko…"

"Are you alright? You seem a bit out of it. Did anything happen?"

"Everything's fine. Don't worry"

She ignored her friends continued ramble and stared at the object handed to her. It was a tennis ball. She remembered it so well, it was her first time buying something for tennis and she spent most of her money on it. And all for him. Such a waste really.

**And every penny from my last paycheck**

**I've blown on you**

She couldn't handle it anymore. She felt like she was suffocating, like there wasn't enough air for her to breathe. She had to live, so she got up and left, living everyone speechless behind her, seeing how it was the middle of class and all.

**I'm bouncing of the walls again**

**I'm looking like a fool again"**

She went to the roof knowing that the height will calm her down. It always did.

'What am I doing? I just left in the middle of class no less. The teacher will kill me next time. But I just couldn't take it. I felt like I was about to scream, or suffocate. Why can't I get him out of my head? … What's this picture? Oh yeah. It's from the time Ryoma won that game in spite of his injury. If I remember well he was pretty much forced to do it. But I was happy and than he said something that made me cry. He always did that. First happy then miserable.

**So go ahead and take a picture**

**And hang it up so you can tear me down.**

Everything was forced about us wasn't it Ryoma? Either my grandma or your friends it was always someone that made you do things for me. So why this? Why now when I gave up? I feel like I'm going nuts, and what's worse is that I'm acting that way as well.

**I'm bouncing of the walls again**

**I'm looking like a fool again"**

THAT'S IT. I have had it. I'm not going to sit here and mope around. I'm going to ask him for a straight answer and I don't care if he laughs in my face or not. I'm not gonna let him run my life. Not any more.'

**I threw away my reputation**

**One more song for the radio station**

With a new resolve she made her way to room 207 where she knew she would find Ryoma. She wanted to know just what kind of game was he playing, and wanted him to stop. And there he was in the class room doing his duties alone.

"Where's Tomoko?"

"She's looking for you."

"We need to talk about yesterday"

"What about yesterday?"

"Why did you do that?" 'Please don't play dumb I don't have the patience'

"Do what?"

"KISS ME" 'who does he think he is playing with me like this. Is it all a joke to him?'

"…"

"Listen Echizen, I don't know what game you're playing but stop it before…"

"Before what?"

"Before I smarten up and kill you."

'So the kitten has claws.'

"…"

When she saw him smirking she simply lost it. All her calm and reserve went straight to hell and before she could think twice her hand went towards his face intent on making contact, but before that could happen he caught it and twisted her around so that she was now in his arms.

'Much better'

"So what was it you wanted to do?"

"Ryoma let me go or I'll…"

"Do what?"

And before she could say another word he covered her mouth with his own. His kiss was more demanding than the one before but it was also gentle and sweet.

'Do you know how much I've missed the taste of your lips? The scent of your hair. Do you know how much I lo…I should end it before I lose it?

He broke the kiss and eased her out of his arms. He smiled when he saw her cheeks flush pink and though he hated it he left.

It took Sakuno several minutes to recover from what just happened and when she saw she was alone once more she did noting more than give a sad laugh to the ears of an empty room.

**I'm bouncing of the walls again**

So are you going to fall again?

'No not this time. It's just a game after all.'

But it still hurts, doesn't it?

'Yeah … it still hurts. But one day it won't'

Let's go home.

well that's it for now. please review, i really want to know what you think about it and if you have any sugestions, than you are more than welcome to send them.


	3. losing you

i don't own prince of tennis (although i really wish i did)

* * *

3 Losing you

It's been a week since Ryoma kissed her and in that time she tried to either avoid him or ignore him, although that proved to be more difficult than she first thought, first of because they studied in the same class so they had to do most projects together as a team. Second, her friends idolized him and made little effort to notice that she was avoiding any subject concerning him and thus rambled continuously about Ryoma-sama, and last but probably most important detail Ryoma didn't like being ignored and made it a point to be as close to her as possible. She would have gone nuts if not for the work she had to do for her clubs and the fact that the day she would see if she was any good at photography was fast approaching made her worry enough to push back all other aspects including Ryoma.

Last summer she discovered that she really loved photography and wanted to get better. Unexpectedly she was faced with a lot of taboos concerning the fact that she was an outsider – her parents were from a different town- and more importantly most of her family members were well known sports figures. In order to surpass that handicap she had to work really hard and also go to a well known critic that was famous for his eccentricity. He gave her one chance; he wanted to see if she could show him 3 good pictures taken by her. If she couldn't than he would never speak to her again, but if she could than he will help her reach her full potential. And the meeting was this Saturday. She was feeling anxious and scared at the same time. Most of her pictures were landscapes and only some were with people she had found interesting, mostly children playing or old couples in love. They had to speak to her to tell her a story before she would take the picture. The ones she favored were those taken from high places. She would climb a newly started building in the dead of night and from there take all the pictures worth taking. Sometimes she climbed as high as the 40th level and sit there on the edge and just look. Other times she would walk around feeling the wind blowing past her, caressing her skin embracing her like a lover.

She loved heights, and maybe that was the reason why she now spent most of her brakes on the school roof. Today was no exception. Leaning down on the concrete roof listening to music as loud as she could closing her eyes to let all thoughts flee and letting the sun warm her body, this was perhaps the best part of her school day. She was always alone up here, except today, when a lone figure stared at her intently.

He watched her silently from a distance, observing every detail for further reference. The clothes she wore were casual yet they fitted her perfectly, a pair of blue jeans and a black button down shirt. It was lose on her figure but because she was lying down it meshed perfectly with her forms allowing him to see a slim waste and … for the first time in his life Fuji felt himself blush. Waiting until he was sure that he was back to his normal self he decided to make his presence known.

"You don't look so good." 'I can't believe I said that. I really didn't mean it that way.'

"And hearing it from you really helps buddy."

Fuji was surprised, he never heard her talk so baldly to anyone before. Not even her friends. His interest in her just grew exponentially right then.

"I mean you look troubled."

Opening her eyes to see who was, the guy pestering her she was taken aback when she saw a pair of blue eyes staring at her.

"Oh it was you Fuji sempai. Sorry, didn't mean to bite your head of like that."

"I'll forgive if you tell me what's troubling you."

"I just have a lot on my mind, with club activity and all"

"Yes I've heard that you're in the lit club are you in other clubs as well?"

"Yeah, the modern art club. Where did you hear that I was in the lit club?"

"Oishi. He keeps talking about you."

"…"

Snap

"Hey, why did you take that picture?"

"You should have seen the look on your face, it screamed shock. I had to take a picture or I would have regretted it."

"Do you always have a camera with you?"

"Don't you?"

"Yes."

As the two chatted the break away a third person was making his way towards them and when he saw them being so friendly Ryoma felt like he was about to explode. Every time they laughed he was closer to insanity, every time he would compliment her he felt like killing him, and then the final blow to his heart was delivered by an unaware girl that made him unreasonably mad at times.

"God I love this song."

"What song"

"Here listen"

Leaning closer to him so that she could give him the head set, she leaned on him for support unaware that she had an audience and of how that looked to a strangers eye.

She sang quietly the melody mostly out of habit and because she knew al of the words from the song.

**_Bounce baby out the door_**

**_I ain't gonna take this no more_**

**_Bounce baby out the door_**

**_Get up and move_**

**_Don't make me act a fool_**

**_Just bounce_**

As she said the last verse from the song she made a flicking move with her hand as if shooing a fly away, right in the direction where Ryoma was staying and watching her. That made his heart throb in pain and deciding that he could take no more he got up and left. He felt like his heart had been tore to shreds and he knew it was all His fault.

'What did you expect? You never told her how you feel, did you really think that she would wait for you. But she does have feelings about me. If she wouldn't she wouldn't have kissed me the way she did. What are you talking about? You almost forced her to kiss you. And you always left afterwards, so are you really that surprised that she got over you? Did she really? How can I be sure? You could always ask her. Than that's what I'll do.'

For once he was happy that Tezuka made him run laps for being late. This way he could cool down a bit before talking to her.

Back on the roof Fuji and Sakuno were laughing hard because of a story the former told her. They seemed to be perfectly comfortable in each others presence and for the first time in ages Fuji felt at ease without his mask on.

'I don't know why but I feel like I don't have to pretend around you, like I can be sad or happy or show any kind of emotion and not be considered weak. Maybe it's because you actually listen to what I say.'

"Hey would you like to come to a place I love this Saturday?"

"I'd love to but Saturday I have to meet someone"

"Oh… I understand."

"No you don't."

"…"

"I'm going to see if I can realize my dream or not."

And so she told him everything that happened that summer and she was surprised that she felt so comfortable around him. Like she used to feel with Tomoko.

"Thanks for listening Fuji you're a great friend."

"Well I'm sure you'll do fine, but please call me when you get an answer and I'll take you out for a victory dinner."

"Or an 'I lost so make me cheerful' one."

"Either way it works out nicely"

"Why are you doing this?"

"Because I think you'd be a great friend and I want to be the same way. So friends should support one another."

"Thanks, I really do need a friend right now."

"I have to go now or Tezuka will make me run 100 laps. So see you on Saturday, and don't worry you can make your dreams come true."

"Bye"

She watched the boy leave and thought about what he said. It would be nice to have a friend. Since she tried not to talk about Ryoma, TomoKo and the others pushed her aside. It was like they belonged to different worlds now. It made her feel sad and lonely but now she hopped that she could find a friend in Fuji. It felt nice talking to someone about your problems or dreams.

'My dreams…"

When Fuji arrived at the tennis courts the practice was already half finished. That earned him the grand prize of 50 laps around the court from Tezuka. He wasn't mad though. It was his fault and so he paid the price, but he didn't regret it either. He was looking forward to this Saturday, for more than one reason.

When practice ended Kikumaru approached him asking for help with some subject.

"Sorry eiji but I can't this Saturday, if you want we can do it on Sunday."

"It's ok but why can't you do it on Saturday?"

"Yeah Fuji sempai. Is it a date?"

"As a matter of fact yes"

Everyone was shocked speechless, by the young prodigy's words. They had known Fuji for 4 years and not even once did he show the slightest interest in a girl, and now he calmly states that he's going out with one. It was almost to much for the boys too take. For all except Ryoma who suspected that the girl was none other than Sakuno.

'I have to go talk to her and soon. I can't lose her. I lov…. I just can't "

Without another word Ryoma took of to look for Sakuno.

"tomoko have you seen Sakuno?"

"She went home. Why? What do you want from her?"

"Nothing."

"Then leave her alone. You might think that I haven't noticed but I did. I don't know what you've done but you've hurt her. So please stop it. She's my best friend and I can't stand seeing her so sad. Just stay away from her."

"I can't"

"I knew you'd say that…" 'So he really does love her. I just hope he rights whatever he did wrong before it's too late. Sakuno's been sad lately and I have the feeling it's because of him, but she also became stronger and I have no doubt that although it hurts like hell she'll try and forget about him. I just wish she could talk to me about it.'

Ryoma left towards her house but when he got there he found no one. He waited for her until dark but when she didn't appear he decided to leave and talk to her tomorrow. Unfortunately for him she didn't show up the next day and worry began to consume him. He tried asking Tomoko but she didn't know either he than got mad when he heard Fuji talking to one of the teachers about her and explaining why she wasn't there. The excuse was lame but the teacher bought it. Ryoma on the other hand was loosing control. By the time practice started the aura that surrounded him was so dark that Kaidoh actually turned white. When he began playing he was ruthless. It was like a massacre on the courts.

"Hey, why is ryoma so scary?"

"Eiji sempai. It's your turn."

"I don't wanna. Ah Tezuka save me. I'll do laps, I'll even drink Inui's juice just keep him away from me."

"Ne buchou play with me."

At this Tezuka actually cringed. Ryoma was a worthy opponent when he was calm and collected, but now that he was upset –the understatement of the century- he was truly terrifying, and Tezuka had no desire of getting slaughtered literally.

"I think you've had enough training for today. Go change."

As soon as he was of the tennis court, a cry of joy could be heard by anyone in a 5 mile radius.

When he got home he tried calling her but no one answered. He even left her a message to call him back because he had something important to talk to her about.

But as he waited there was no call for him and he couldn't help the desperation creeping inside his heart.

**_Llama no importa la hora que yo estoy aquí_**

**_Entre las cuatro paredes de mi habitación_**

**_I es importante al menos decirte_**

**_Que esto de tu ausencia duele i tu no sabes cuanto_**

Just one phone call and he could be at ease. She could make this pain stop, he wanted to see her, to hold her tight in his arms and never let go. He closed his eyes trying to forget her but his mind only showed him images of her. How she used to laugh, or the way she blushed. How cute she looked when concentrating on something, or when she got mad, and how she used to make him laugh.

_**Ven aparécete, tan solo comunícate**_

_**Que cada hora es un golpe de desolación**_

_**Es demasiado aburrido no estar a tu lado**_

He felt his world crumbling around him and he couldn't do anything about it. He couldn't sleep that night and the following day seemed to be in tone with his mood, dark and murky. But even the rain reminded him of her. She loved the rain, he once heard her say that she felt calm when it was raining. For him the only thing that soothed his soul was her. But she never knew that because he never told her, and now she was on a date with Fuji. He didn't know if his heart could take it much longer.

**_Ven que mi alma no quiere dejarte ir_**

**_Que los minutos me acechan, aquí todo es gris_**

**_Que alrededor todo es miedo y desesperanza_**

He felt alone, abandoned in the cold with nothing to cover his shivering soul. And he waited for her to call, to tell him that it was going to be all right. But she never called and he felt more and more depressed. Nothing seemed to make sense anymore, his life was in shambles and he couldn't blame anyone but himself.

**_Ven que nunca imaginaba como era estar solo_**

**_Que no es nada fácil cuando te derrotan_**

**_Que no ce que hacer, y aquí no queda nada de nada_**

After another sleepless night he got out of bed and ready for school. His head was such a mess that he almost forgot his equipment. He just didn't care anymore. Today he would see her and know, if his life was worth leaving or not, if he had a chance of getting her back or if she had forgotten him. He didn't know what he would do if she didn't love him anymore, he never thought abut it before. It was like she was a part of him a vital part that he couldn't leave without.

'I guess I should have told her that sooner. Maybe if I told her how much I loved her she would have been here in my arms right now instead of feeling this unbearable cold.'

**_No me enseñaste como estar sin ti_**

**_I que le digo yo a este corazón_**

**_Si tu te has ido y todo lo perdí_**

**_Por donde empiezo si todo acabo_**

**_No me enseñaste como estar sin ti_**

**_Como olvidarte si nunca aprendí_**

He arrived at school early and he was surprised when she walked in. She was smiling, and her eyes were shinning like before. He noticed that for a while her eyes had lost some of their sparkle. Now they were bright and alive with joy. He felt his heart beginning to brake for he understood that she had forgotten him. He wanted everything the way it used to be. He wished he could go back and make things right. But he couldn't and seeing her was enough for him. She was like a drug for him but he wanted her to be happy, even if she won't be happy with him.

But he would always love her. No mater what he wouldn't forget how he felt.

**_Llama i devuélveme todo lo que un día fui_**

**_Esta locura te verte se vuelve obsesión_**

**_Cuando me invaden estos días tristes_**

**_Siempre recuerdo mi vida, yo como te amo_**

He began walking out of the school, he couldn't stay near her, not today. He loved her so much so why did she forget about him. Wondering the streets with no particular place to go he ended up at the park he and Sakuno came to play tennis at. Then he couldn't stop the tears trickling down his face nor could he stop the rage that filled him. Rage towards her for casting him aside, towards Fuji for taking her away but most of all towards himself for letting her go.

'So go after her.'

I've lost. It's no use

'Can you truly tell me that you can be without her?'

No

'Then fight for her.'

How?

'Tell her how you feel.'

It's too late.

'It's never too late.'

_**No me enseñaste como estar sin ti**_

_**I que le digo yo a este corazón**_

_**Si tu te has ido y todo lo perdí**_

_**Por donde empiezo si todo acabo**_

_**No me enseñaste como estar sin ti**_

_**Como olvidarte si nunca aprendí**_

'I'm sorry Sakuno, I know that my words might hurt you, and I know that I don't have the right to expect you to love me but I have to try, because I don't know how to live without you.'


	4. one last chance

ok this is the last chapter, sorry for the late update and i hope that you like it. also i apologize for any gramar erors that i made and i hope that there weren't too many.

in one of the former chapters i explained the way my school sistem is and i just wanted to ad that Ryoma is in highschool which makes him 16 years old.

disclamer: i don't own prince of tennis (if i did the anime would have had a better ending ;p)

**4 One last chance**

By the time Ryoma reached the school classes had already finished and the tennis club was gathering. Ryoma paid no notice to Momo sempais calls and Tezuka's warnings. He had to find her, no matter what. And there she was right in front of him looking straight into his eyes. He grabbed her hand and dragged her to a more private spot. He didn't want an audience.

"Ryoma what are you…"

She was silenced by a light kiss on her lips.

"Shhh… Please listen to me. Don't say a word just listen. I know that you're going out with Fuji now and I wanted to be happy for you but I can't because I love you to damn much. I know you probably hate me by now and want nothing to do with me but I had to tell you my feelings. I just couldn't give you up without a last fight."

"I give up. Are you satisfied?"

With all the strength she had left she pushed him away and ran away.

He never expected to hear what he did, never expected he to act that way but it all made a strange sort of sense and he understood that he had a chance.

He wanted to go after her but in his way now stood Fuji. He didn't predict the punch that sent him hurdling to the ground. But he got up ready to fight. He had to hurry and go after her.

"I don't have time for this Fuji"

"To bad."

Another punch and hello dirt.

"Why did you make her cry? Why couldn't you leave her alone? Why do you have to hurt her all the time?"

"You're right. I am an idiot but I can't let her go. Not when I love her so much."

"Than you'll have to go through me."

"So be it"

A punch and a low kick sent Fuji straight into an unsuspecting wall. He looked at Ryoma and smiled sadly.

"If you really do love her than you'd better go and find her. It's gonna rain soon." And right after he said that rain started to fall.

Ryoma knew exactly where she was. The only place she found comfort. The abandoned block on 6th street. It was a huge building. It was designed to have 100 levels and 5 sublevels. But it wasn't finished. It was only the skeleton.

He rushed there not caring that he was getting soaked, all he could think about was her and how cold and confused she must feel.

_**Just one last dance, oh baby just one last chance**_

He saw he r standing there, unmoving and for the first time she looked really small and frail. Like a mere gust of wind could brake her in a million pieces. Careful not to scare her he sat down next to her and just watched her for a while, the way tears were making their way down her cheeks and how her now wet hair was framing her face, the way her body trembled because of the cold rain and sobs. He watched her until it was to much for him to take and suddenly took her in his arms. She didn't fight him, she didn't have the strength, but when she finally decided to get out of his embrace he began talking and she couldn't do anything more than listen.

"Do you remembered when we first met? You were on the same train with me and some guys were scaring you. I wanted to tear them apart for doing that. I didn't know why, and it scared me so I decided to run away. Yes, I was running away from you. I was afraid of what I was feeling. Then I found out that you were going at the same school as me. That made me so happy, but I didn't know how to tell you so I kept quiet, every time you came to one of my games or showed concerned I was happy. But I made the biggest mistake by never telling you how I felt and now I've almost lost you."

_**We meet in the night in the Spanish café**_

_**I look i your eyes just don't know what to say**_

_**It feels like I'm drowning in salty water**_

_**A few hours left till the sun's gonna rise**_

_**Tomorrow will come and it's time to realize**_

_**Our love has finished forever**_

"Stop playing games Ryoma. Please. I can't take it anymore."

"Why would you think that this is a game?"

At that she tried to get out of his embrace but he just held her tighter.

"If it isn't than why do you leave every time we kiss? Do you know how much that hurts? How many times does my heart have to break until you'll stop? Why do you hurt me so much? Why do you always keep quiet?

"Because I didn't know how to tell you…"

"What"

"That I love you."

Can I really trust you Ryoma?"

**_How I wish to come with you_**

**_How I wish we make it through_**

At this he smiled and bent his head so that he could kiss her. This time he poured all hiss feelings of love and desperation, of sadness and fear of losing her, hopping that she would understand and give him one last chance.

"Will you leave again?"

"Stupid I'm never going to let you go ever again."

"Good."

She leaned into his embrace letting go of all her doubts and fears. He loved her, she now knew it and it was enough for now. The fatigue from the last days finally caught up with her and she began dozing of feeling comfortable and warm in his embrace.

Watching her sleeping form Ryoma wanted to stay that way forever but the rain forced him to get up. So holding Sakuno gently in his arms he headed towards his house not wanting to give her up to anyone, not even her grandma.

His house was empty because everyone left to a convention, which he was thankful for, he laid her down on his bed and got some clean dry clothes out of his dresser. He reluctantly woke her up and told her she should change, after which he did the same.

When he returned she was sitting up starring at him.

"I thought you left "

Just one last dance

Before we say good bye

When we say and turn round and round and round

He smiled at her and pulled her in his arms.

"I told you that I'll never leave you.

They both fell asleep at the same time in each others embrace

**_It's like the first time_**

**_Just one more chance_**

**_Hold me tight and keep me warm_**

**_Cause the night is getting cold_**

**_And I don't know where I belong_**

She felt warm and comfortable but couldn't really remember why. Then she opened her eyes and after seeing Ryoma staring intently at her she remembered everything and a small blush crossed her cheeks. Ryoma simply smiled and kissed her.

"Morning"

"Morning"

They were both aware that they had to get up but none of them wanted to. They didn't want to risk losing what they had. But today was a school day and so with regret they decided to get up.

Sakuno was the first one to shower and for a change of clothes she was forced to where Ryoma's old jeans that he last wore the when he was 13 (he is 17 now) and one of his bulls t-shirt that covered her to mid thigh.

She was making breakfast when a pair of strong arms encircled her waist interrupting her work.

"You know, you just ruined your breakfast."

"Than I'll just have some of yours."

"I don't eat breakfast. Ah come on don't pout. It's not fair."

"…"

"Fine! Just sit down and eat before I change my mind. I let you get away with to much."

When they arrived to school they caused most of their friends and class mates a shock. Not only were they holding hands, but SHE was wearing his favorite shirt. The one he almost killed Momo-sempai whet a latter spilled water on it.

But they ignored them, and made fun of the rumors that were spreading with light speed around school being deliriously happy in their own little world.

_** The end**_

_**  
**_


End file.
